I watched a moving 9/11 documentary about the attack on the world trade centers yesterday evening. The documentary vividly told the stories of a selected groups of individuals whose fight for survival ended in triumph or tragedy. One of the most powerful moments in the documentary, which later inspired me to write this post, happened shortly after the second plane hit the south tower. The building was virtually split into two, a top and a bottom, with the only escape route to the ground, a narrow stairwell. People inside the building above the crash zone felt the monstrous impact, as some described that the floor below them moved horizontally six feet. After the initial moment of shock and confusion passed, people's attitudes turned to survival mode. However, one giant contradiction blasted through the building's emergency loudspeaker system, "There is an emergency, stay in your offices." Little did many of these people who listened to this message and stayed put in their offices understand that about an hour later, the entire building would collapse.

This chilling story highlights an important point, the immense importance of successful communication. While nothing can compare to the tragedies suffered by the many that fell that fell on that chilly September day in 2001, looking in retrospect, history's events offer ample opportunities for learning. The question is now blaring: how do people communicate better?

I sat in on a training session by Scott Demoulin, an accomplished speaker, trainer and consultant in sales, communications and personal performance enhancement. He is currently the President of OneCoach, a small business coaching and consulting company based in San Diego. The session focussed on the precision communication model, a simple solution to improving communication that helped him triple his profits in less than 6 months.

Scott described that so many times, whether in business, everyday life, or in intimate relationships, miscommunication can lead to disastrous outcomes. We've probably all experienced this in a relationship with a friend or significant other. Scott attributes miscommunication to the the various words and constructions of words people use to "communicate" between each other.

When two people communicate, one person makes a statement or a claim, and the other person generates a response. This continues back and forth, back and forth, until a resolution is achieved, or not achieved. Breaking down communication barriers means analyzing the words you use to describe an idea or situation, and as equally as important, the words you choose to respond with.

Many times, people make broad, ambiguous statements that aren't necessarily accurate, even though they are attempting to communicate something that actually of happened, at least on some levels. For example, in an management meeting, a marketing manager may complain that too many projects are being dished to her team with little notice or time to complete them. She might claim, "This always happens... other departments give us projects at the last minute... all the time." Three words really complicate the situation: "always," "give," and "all." The marketing manager must ask herself in all honesty, does this really always happen? The answer is absolutely not. Many times, things will happen only once, and the emotions that are triggered by this event lead to exaggerations or fabrications. This is normal and many people do it without even noticing. Exaggeration isn't the truth and leads to major communication issues.

How do the other managers respond to the marketing manager's claim? They simplify, slice, and dice. When replying to universals, terms that are absolute, such as "always" and "all," simply respond, "Does this really happen always" or "all the time"? The answer is no. This mutual acceptance is the first step to clear communication and resolution. When the marketing manager suggested that other departments always give her team projects, the appropriate response to any verb-driven comment such as this would simply be "How specifically do people give you this work?... Who allocated this work? Who was it authorized by? How was it communicated?..."

These questions lead to solutions. For example, maybe a new structure for allocating work efficiently needs to be implemented immediately. Maybe multiple people are designating work and a clear decision making hierarchy must be established. Maybe only one person should be communicating directly to the marketing manager, with all requests for marketing projects first filtering through this person so that they can organize and prioritize appropriately.

Communication is paramount in life. In business, successful communication can be the lifeblood of a business. If your company is drowning in dept and not making significant gains, always ask yourself first, how is my company communicating?